Archive for the ‘Jackie Davidson’ Category

ministry_logo-01_EDITED_REDby Fred W. Anson and Jackie Davidson
She was a really nice lady and a wonderful friend. But she wouldn’t stop talking about her “ministry”. He was a really great guy, warm, friendly, outgoing and really, genuinely cared about people. But he couldn’t stop talking about his “ministry”. I could stop right now and you could give us names, places, and “ministries” couldn’t you? That’s right even if we’ve never met, even if we live in different states, go to different churches and are theologically at odds we could both tell each other stories about Christians we’ve known that fit the scenario that I’ve just described. Isn’t that interesting?

Or how about this one?

She had a dramatic, born again experience. Her life was dramatically changed and she became a different person it seemed, almost instantly. There was no doubt that God had intervened like a bolt of lightning and performed a miracle. That was a month or two ago and now she was telling me, “I’ve just got to find my ministry!”

Sound familiar?
Maybe it was you.
Maybe it’s you right now.

Modern American Christians (we can’t speak for other cultures, we don’t know them well enough) are obsessed with finding, having, and growing their “ministry”. The lady that we described in our opening couldn’t tell you if the Book of Hebrews was in the Old or New Testament, couldn’t tell you why the doctrine of the Trinity was important, and thought that Joel Osteen was a wonderful man of God and gifted Bible teacher – and for the record, he’s a heretic. Another lady that we knew was bouncing from one seminary to another trying to get her credential so she could have a public “ministry” and start preaching at churches. All this while divorced and the single mother of two kids who, we suspect, were feeling the neglect that comes from being sacrificed for “ministry”.

Fred Anson was one of those kids. His father was in many ways a wonderful man but everything and everyone got sacrificed for his “ministry”. As his mother used to say, “Why is he down at the church building repairing a pipe when our pipes are leaking here at home? Why is he over at the house of the co-worker doing a remodel so he can witness to him when our house is falling apart?” And Fred would add, “Why was he always off doing volunteer work for children’s charities rather than explaining to his own kids how to survive in this broken and fallen world?” Oh yes, friends, we know all too well what happens when “ministry” becomes the ultimate thing in a Christian’s life. As well known Presbyterian Pastor Timothy Keller notes:

What is an idol? It is anything more important to you than God, anything that absorbs your heart and imagination more than God, anything you seek to give you what only God can give. . . .

An idol is whatever you look at and say, in your heart of hearts, “If I have that, then I’ll feel my life has meaning, then I’ll know I have value, then I’ll feel significant and secure.” There are many ways to describe that kind of relationship to something, but perhaps the best one is worship.

A counterfeit god is anything so central and essential to your life that, should you lose it, your life would feel hardly worth living.1

"Counterfeit Gods" by Timothy Keller

“Counterfeit Gods” by Timothy Keller

Isn’t this really what’s so often happening with “ministry” these days in modern American Christian culture? We’ve turned a good thing into an ultimate thing – and by doing so have turned it into an idol. Thankfully Keller also gives the solution to the problem:

Idols cannot simply be removed. They must be replaced. If you only try to uproot them, they grow back; but they can be supplanted. By what? By God himself, of course. But by God we do not mean a general belief in his existence. Most people have that, yet their souls are riddled with idols. What we need is a living encounter with God.2

OK, the concept is good but how can we make this real? What worked for us was thinking through this whole “ministry” thing and coming to realize that the the word “ministry” simply means “to function in the office of a servant”. So if we’re “ministering” I’m really doing nothing more than serving – which is biblical, just as Bob Deffinbaugh explains:

The predominant word for ministry in the New Testament is diakoneo (the noun form of which is diakonia). From this root, the term, deacon, (in Greek, diakonos) is derived. One of many possible expressions, it most accurately conveys the New Testament function of ministry. Our Lord and the apostles employed diakoneo to invest ministry with a meaning to both the Jews, and the Greeks.

To the Greeks, there was no dignity in service. In the words of the Greek sophist:

“How can a man be happy when he has to serve someone?”

The only service deemed to be of high value was that rendered in behalf of the state.

How different was our Lord’s concept of the ministry:

“For even the Son of Man did not come to be served (passive form of diakoneo) but to serve (active form of diakoneo), and to give his life as a ransom for many” (Mark 10:45).

Jesus taught His followers that serving was a vital part of discipleship:

“If anyone wants to serve (diakoneo) me, he must follow me, and where I am, my servant (diakonos) will be too. If anyone serves (diakoneo) me, the Father will honor him” (John 12:26).

In the teaching of Jesus, greatness was to be measured in terms of service:

“Jesus called them and said to them, “You know that those who are recognized as rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and those in high positions use their authority over them. But it is not this way among you. Instead whoever wants to be great among you must be your servant (diakonos), and whoever wants to be first among you must be the slave of all” (Mark 10:42-44).

All of this invested New Testament ministry with a dignity unimagined by the Greeks of that day.3

So if one wants a “ministry” for any other reason other than out of an attitude of service something isn’t right. Further, the question is this, “service to who?” Trust us, we speak from hard experience when we say that it’s entirely possible to think that you’re serving others when you’re really just serving yourself. And we will state plainly that the praise and gratitude of those people that you help can be intoxicating! It can be easy to serve to get the high that comes from it. And yes, the recognition that one can get from “ministry” have you breathing rarefied air if you’re not careful – you might even start believing that you actually deserve the praise that you’re getting.

So tell me friend, who’s getting the glory there?

And here’s a question: Who gave you the talents that you’re now sharing with others? Remember this?

For the kingdom of heaven is like a man traveling to a far country, who called his own servants and delivered his goods to them. And to one he gave five talents, to another two, and to another one, to each according to his own ability; and immediately he went on a journey.
(Matthew 25:14-15 NKJV)

We are, of course, only speaking to ourselves since we know no one else has ever forgotten or taken for granted the fact that without the Master we would be nothing and have nothing. He owes us nothing, and we owe Him everything. So it’s only logical that when in service our attitude must always be, “He must increase, but I must decrease.” (John 3:30 NKJV) Friend, without Jesus we are nothing!

In the end the real question is this: Why do you need a “ministry” if you have a Master?

Dirck van Baburen, "Christ Washing the Apostles Feet" (c.1616)

Dirck van Baburen, “Christ Washing the Apostles Feet” (c.1616) Here Christian, is the Master’s ministry model.

The Way of The Master
Now here’s the thing about having a Master: He gets to tell you what to do when to do it, and how to do it. And, here’s the part that modern Christians don’t seem to like much, He can tell you when to stop or not do it all. Example, let’s consider the Apostle Paul.

While the exact chronology and dating of the events in the Apostle Paul’s life are still a topic of dispute among biblical scholars,4 the fact remains that there was a significant gap between when Paul became a Christian and when he became a missionary. Remember the Book of Acts covers events that occurred between around 30-62AD.5 That puts Paul’s conversion (Acts 9:1-9) around 33AD and his first call to missions (Acts 13:2-3) at about 47AD. Folks that’s a 14-year gap!

Think about that! Here is a guy who was schooled by one of the most famous and respected Jewish Rabbis not just of his time but of all time, Gamaliel (see Acts 22:3). A man to whom Jesus Christ personally appeared to in a vision and whose life Christ completely overturned and transformed. This is a guy that today would be on the Christian talk show, church, and book circuits within a year or two of his conversion. Yet what was the Master’s bidding during that 14-year period? What “ministry” did he have? Apparently, it was the “ministry” of being trained, equipped, and prepared for what was to come because once the Master said, “Go!” he went – and he performed masterfully when he did.

Still not convinced? Then let’s talk about this guy called Moses who spent 40-years exiled in the wilderness until God called him to his “ministry”.6 Or how about Abraham who had to wait for 19-years from the promise of Isaac until his birth?7 Or, last but not least, how about Christ – God incarnate – who had to wait for 30-years for His “ministry” only to have it last 3-years? The way of the Master is not our way my friend – it’s far better!

Yes, it’s tempting for a new Christian to want to go into some sort of ministry. Baby Christians are on fire for the Lord. They want to spread their new found joy to everyone. And this is especially true for former Mormons or those who come from other works-based religions. Ex-Mormons are used to having their Bishop tell them what to do – and remember in Mormonism if you say no to a calling there will be hell to pay down the road. So when Ex-Mormons become Christian, if they’re asked they just say yes to everything. Their pastor loves it! However, a year later they end up with too many ministries, an overloaded plate, and none of it being done well. Plus they are not doctrinally trained enough to actually minister to others.

And we could talk about all those “zombie” Facebook groups that were started and then abandoned because someone who just had to have a “ministry” created the group on a whim. Then they discovered the hard way that they weren’t equipped to lead or sustain such an endeavor either practically or theologically. So there the group sits, doing nothing, going nowhere, benefiting no one, crickets chirping, existing but not alive. If there were dust, rust, and wood-rot in cyberspace it would be covered with it.8

Finally, since it’s so common, we want to warn our transitioning Mormon friends about well-meaning Christians who will try to turn them into weapons against Mormonism immediately after they leave the LdS Church. This isn’t idle speculation – expect it, it will happen. Simply put, don’t listen to them.

Consider this: Could Christ have had a better weapon than Paul against the apostate Judaism of his day? Or a better weapon than Moses, a former Prince, against pagan Egypt for that matter? Yet the Master waited until they were properly equipped and trained before He missioned them – think about that my friend. We know that it is so, so, so easy to pick up the sword against the LdS Church after you exit and even easier to swing it, but here’s a word of advice learned from hard experience: Don’t.9

"Moses Flees" (unknown artist)

“Moses Flees” (unknown artist) Can anyone else relate to what Moses must have been feeling here?

Equipping the Saints (and Other Stuff That Everyone Seems to Want to Ignore)
We have seen a lot of harm come from Baby Christians (and sorry Ex-Mormon but after you exit you are a baby Christian no matter how long you were in the LdS Church and what your callings were) who have no firm theological foundation, don’t know their Bible, have no knowledge of proper hermeneutics, Christian Church history, historic Christian orthodoxy, modern Christian culture, or even proper Christian terminology, create a “ministry” for themselves. We have seen them destroy their own faith while they’re destroying the faith of others – usually taking themselves and their parishioners and into the morass of atheism. We have seen them alienate themselves from the community of saints due to their unteachable attitudes and recalcitrant behavior. We have even seen them end their own marriages because they were so driven to have a “ministry” that they ran over their spouse. We have seen them do exactly as Jesus said they would:

“They are blind leaders of the blind. And if the blind leads the blind, both will fall into a ditch.”
(Matthew 15:14 NKJV)

Ironically, even the infidels know better than to act with such folly! One of Fred’s mentors – an apostate, cultural Jew – once challenged him with this, “How do you know what to do about what’s going on until you know what’s going on?” And in a similar vein, a secular, materialist, agnostic mentor, counseled him to, “Do nothing for the first 90-days except watch, listen, and learn. That way you’ll know exactly what to do on day 91.” This, of course, is nothing more than an echo of the biblical wisdom which says:

“Fools think their own way is right,
but the wise listen to others.”
(Proverbs 12:15 NLT)

“A wise man doesn’t display his knowledge,
but a fool displays his foolishness.”
(Proverbs 12:23 TLB)

“Sensible people always think before they act,
but stupid people advertise their ignorance.”
(Proverbs 13:16 GNT)

“Become wise by walking with the wise;
hang out with fools and watch your life fall to pieces.”
(Proverbs 13:20 The Message)

“Fools have no interest in understanding;
they only want to air their own opinions.”
(Proverbs 18:2 NLT)

So you want a ministry? Here’s a tip, change the 90-days to 9-years from Fred’s secular mentor’s advice and wait patiently on the Lord while you’re doing it. And if you have any questions while you’re waiting just open up your Bible and start reading. But trust us, friend, while you’re waiting you will still have plenty to do – life happens!

"Christ Washing The Feet of His Disciples" (unknown artist) Mosiac, Basilica di San Marco, Venice

“Christ Washing The Feet of His Disciples” (unknown artist) Mosiac, Basilica di San Marco, Venice

Equipped But Not Called
It’s also common for mature Christians to try to make those that they haven’t really been called to, a target for “ministry”. They do so by not spending the time required to learn the worldview and theology of the people that they’re approaching. Instead, they just go out and act as if these people are clones of them self. As Nancy Pearcey observes:

What would you think of a missionary in a Muslim country who refused to learn about Muslim culture? He would not be very effective in communicating a biblical message. Cultivating a missional mind-set means being willing to learn both the language and the thought patterns of our mission field.

When Paul said, “I have become all things to all people” (1 Cor. 9:22), he did not mean dressing like the locals. Nor was he embracing cultural relativism. Instead he was taking the assumptions of his audience into consideration in his language and approach. He tried to see the world through their eyes so he could communicate more persuasively.10

The harm that this presumption causes is unbelievable. We have seen one transitioning Mormon after another driven into atheism due to well meaning but ignorant and culturally insensitive Christians disrespecting and offending them in this manner. They figure that if Christians can’t be bothered to learn about them then obviously Christianity doesn’t have anything to say to them. And frankly, we don’t blame them having once been on the receiving end of this closed-minded, myopic, and often bigoted, behavior ourselves. If you have any doubts about this just go up on just about any Mormon/Evangelical internet discussion board and you’ll see it. If that doesn’t do it then go on YouTube and watch the “Street Screechers” driving Mormons away from God and deeper into Mormonism on Temple Square.

Simply put dear mature Christian brother or sister, taking it upon yourself to go into “ministry” without the proper equipping, training, and divine calling is not only poor stewardship of your talents, it can actually harm the very people that you think you’re helping. Whether it’s people in Africa, the homeless, or well to do Ex-Mormons, they are precious souls to be loved and cared for. It is extremely important that the person who is shepherding these people be prepared to shepherd them in accordance with the Golden Rule. And if all this has made you realize that you need more time to prepare yourself for the mission field then just sit back and rest in the arms of the Lord while He prepares you like He did Paul.

Wait on the Lord;
Be of good courage,
And He shall strengthen your heart;
Wait, I say, on the Lord!
(Psalm 27:14 NKJV) 

Have you not known?
Have you not heard?
The everlasting God, the Lord,
The Creator of the ends of the earth,
Neither faints nor is weary.
His understanding is unsearchable.
He gives power to the weak,
And to those who have no might He increases strength.
Even the youths shall faint and be weary,
And the young men shall utterly fall,
But those who wait on the Lord
Shall renew their strength;
They shall mount up with wings like eagles,
They shall run and not be weary,
They shall walk and not faint.
(Isaiah 40:28-31 NKJV)

Further, the Bible tells us both plainly and repeatedly that we are to be under pastoral oversight not just in our ministry but in general.11 Be accountable, be teachable, be shepherded yourself. Never stop researching and pray for God’s guidance constantly. If and when the Master says “Go!” then go. If and when the Master says, “Stop” then stop. If He says, “Speak” then speak. And if He says, “Be quiet” then stop speaking and remain silent. After all, friend this really isn’t your “ministry” at all is it? It’s His, always has been, always will be. So say it with me, dear Christian:

“I have no ministry, I have the Master. And that’s enough.”

servant

NOTES
1 Timothy Keller, “Counterfeit Gods”, pp.xvii-xviii
2 Ibid, Chapter 7
3 Bob Deffinbaugh, “The Meaning of New Testament Ministry”
4 Timeline of the Apostle Paul
5 Chronology of Acts and the Epistles
6 Exodus Bible Timeline
7 Complete Bible Timeline
8 And by the way, before you start one yourself, speaking as people who have been administrating multiple Facebook groups over a number of years (and have the scars to prove it) please know there’s a reason why they call Internet administration, “feeding the beast” when it comes to providing content and “taming the beast” when it comes to monitoring and administrating it. It’s not for the fainthearted or ill-equipped!
9 Please see Fred W. Anson’s article, “On Taking Up The Sword” for a fuller explanation and caution on this. Want to guarantee that you will remain a Baby Christian forever our newly exited Ex-Mormon friend? No problem, just pick up that sword and start swinging it!
10 Nancy Pearcey, “Finding Truth: 5 Principles for Unmasking Atheism, Secularism, and Other God Substitutes”, p.250, Kindle Edition. In specific regard to Mormonism, the reader may also be interested in Fred Anson’s article, ‘Weak Arguments #9: “I don’t need to understand Mormon culture or learn how to speak like a Mormon…”’
11 Please consider the following:

“Obey your leaders and submit to them, for they are keeping watch over your souls, as those who will have to give an account. Let them do this with joy and not with groaning, for that would be of no advantage to you. Pray for us, for we are sure that we have a clear conscience, desiring to act honorably in all things. I urge you the more earnestly to do this in order that I may be restored to you the sooner. Now may the God of peace who brought again from the dead our Lord Jesus, the great shepherd of the sheep, by the blood of the eternal covenant, equip you with everything good that you may do his will, working in us that which is pleasing in his sight, through Jesus Christ, to whom be glory forever and ever. Amen.”
(Hebrews 13:17-21 ESV) 

“Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another.”
(Proverbs 27:17 ESV)

“Brothers, if anyone is caught in any transgression, you who are spiritual should restore him in a spirit of gentleness. Keep watch on yourself, lest you too be tempted. Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.”
(Galatians 6:1-2 ESV)

“If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have gained your brother. But if he does not listen, take one or two others along with you, that every charge may be established by the evidence of two or three witnesses. If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church. And if he refuses to listen even to the church, let him be to you as a Gentile and a tax collector.”
(Matthew 18:15-17 ESV)

“Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working.”
(James 5:16 ESV)

“Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up! Again, if two lie together, they keep warm, but how can one keep warm alone? And though a man might prevail against one who is alone, two will withstand him—a threefold cord is not quickly broken.”
(Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 ESV)

“My brothers, if anyone among you wanders from the truth and someone brings him back, let him know that whoever brings back a sinner from his wandering will save his soul from death and will cover a multitude of sins.”
(James 5:19-20 ESV)

“Therefore, having put away falsehood, let each one of you speak the truth with his neighbor, for we are members one of another.”
(Ephesians 4:25 ESV)

“For I say, through the grace given to me, to everyone who is among you, not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think, but to think soberly, as God has dealt to each one a measure of faith. For as we have many members in one body, but all the members do not have the same function, so we, being many, are one body in Christ, and individually members of one another. Having then gifts differing according to the grace that is given to us, let us use them: if prophecy, let us prophesy in proportion to our faith; or ministry, let us use it in our ministering; he who teaches, in teaching; he who exhorts, in exhortation; he who gives, with liberality; he who leads, with diligence; he who shows mercy, with cheerfulness.”
(Romans 12:3-8 NKJV)

BACK TO TOP

An Appeal to Never Mormon and Ex-Mormon Christians
Preaching

“Billy Sunday Preaching” by George Bellows (c.1915)

by Fred W. Anson and Jackie Davidson
Q: What’s the quickest way to drive a transitioning Mormon into atheism?
A: Christian infighting, dogmatism, and sectarianism.
This isn’t theory, Atheist Ex-Mormon discussion boards are filled with stories about former members of the LdS Church who gave up on Christianity on their way out of the Mormon Church when the Christians that they encountered were just as fanatically sectarian and absolutist as the Mormons that they knew were. Their conclusion? “They’re just two sides of the same fanatical coin.”

The Core Problem
It’s always good to remember what most Mormons think, and the LdS Church teaches: That all Christian churches other than theirs are a big ball of confusion. Consider this from the official LdS Church website:

During the Great Apostasy, people were without divine direction from living prophets. Many churches were established, but they did not have priesthood power to lead people to the true knowledge of God the Father and Jesus Christ.
(Official LdS Church website, “Apostasy”

This is a core doctrine in Mormonism. Public bickering on non-essential Christian doctrines in front of those who have ever been indoctrinated into Mormonism just validates and reinforces this stereotype and prejudice. And it doesn’t matter if that Mormon indoctrination took place last month or last century, the presumption of apostate corruption lingers on. So what does that have to do with Latter-day Saints becoming atheists due to Christian infighting, dogmatism, and sectarianism? Read on.

It Started On Facebook
Back in early 2015 we started an internet recovery group for Ex-Mormons who were trying to navigate the often difficult road into mainstream Christianity. We did this because we saw a crying need for such a group. At the time, while there were tons of  Atheist Ex-Mormon Internet support groups, they all seemed to lacked a positive sense of direction. As a result they had deteriorated into a quagmire of complaints, bitterness and anger. From what we could tell, the only shared value in the groups was a hatred of theism in general and the LdS Church in particular. In some cases there were some who had been out for years, even decades, but had become so eaten up by bitterness that they had become downright mean and nasty –  especially to Ex-Mormon Christians who wandered into their groups. We were sure that we could give these poor battered souls a safe and secure place to heal while they transitioned into mainstream Christianity. So we did.

Billy Sunday

However, it didn’t take very long for the Administrators of our group  to quickly became hyper-sensitive to sectarian infighting between mature Christians in the group. We were stunned at the incredible damage that it was having on those who were either new to the process or who still had wounds healing. The very people that we were trying to help were leaving the group because they were so confused and turned off by these well meaning but unbelievably insensitive and – it must be said – self absorbed, self interested, agenda driven, sectarian Christians. Every time Christians started dogmatically bickered over a non-essential doctrine we would lose a few more. It became quickly apparent that we couldn’t tolerate this behavior from our tribe and would have to take whatever action was required to eliminate it – up to and including a permanent ban on chronic violators.

The result was some of the most embarrassing drama queening that we’ve ever seen on the Internet – and that was on just giving simple warnings to these folks! It got so bad that at times we thought that some of those that got tossed or banned were going to petition their Pope, Patriarch, or Pastor to call us to Church councils so we could be properly anathematized. We were called and accused of some of the most unbelievable things imaginable. It was stunning. To hear some of these Christians tell it, you would think that the Devil and his minions (rather than a bunch of fellow believers and brother and sisters in Christ) were running this quiet little cyberspace community and damning all of its souls to hell!

You’re Kidding Right?
Now to  be fair, coming from mainstream Christian culture ourselves we understand that they were just doing what comes naturally. After all, after two thousand or so years of rough and tumble in house debate about every bit of doctrinal or theological minutiae imaginable – we’re used to this type of “hard ball” collegial exchange. We love it! We relish and luxuriate in it like a Parisian at a free cheese and wine tasting. So what’s the big deal, right?

The problem is that Mormonism is as much a culture as it is a religion – in some ways more so. Further, we mainstream Christians also, usually unknowingly, have a religion that’s heavily infused with our own cultural distinctives. One of them is a casual, easy going, even enthusiastic attitude about debate, discussion, and disagreement that’s generally missing in Mormon culture. As Utah Pastor and Ex-Mormon Ross Anderson explains:

The distinctives of Mormon culture and church life make it very challenging for former Latter-day Saints to become fully integrated into a Christian church. Like immigrants leaving their homeland behind to come to a new world, they must negotiate a confusing journey into a new cultural setting. To establish a new identity with a new church body, the ex-Mormon must develop a new worldview, new roots, new stories, new assumptions, new perspectives, new values and new symbols. On a practical level, he or she must adapt to a myriad of perplexing new customs and practices in the life of the local church.
(Ross Anderson, “Jesus Without Joseph: Following Christ After Leaving Mormonism”, Introduction) 

And a big part of the “country” that Ex-Mormons are immigrating from puts a high value on conflict avoidance. As Michael J. Stevens, a Latter-day Saint researcher and Professor of organizational behavior at Weber State University notes:

I often observe that mainstream LDS Church members along the Wasatch Front have a difficult time confronting any form of disagreement, even when they are clearly uncomfortable or unhappy with what’s being discussed or decided. It’s as if they were conflating all forms of disagreement or conflict with contention. This would be consistent with an overly simplistic reading of 3 Nephi 11:29:

For verily, verily I say unto you, he that hath the spirit of contention is not of me, but is of the devil, who is the father of contention, and he stirreth up the hearts of men to contend with anger, one with another.

If all conflict is viewed as the functional equivalent of having the “spirit of contention,” what options are left to a person who disagrees, or sees things differently, or who has goals and interests different from the rest of the community? How can one raise objections or question and challenge others, or raise unpleasant topics, if doing so is tantamount to being in league with Beelzebub? If one’s view of all conflict is that it must be avoided so as to avoid contention, then there is no direct, healthy, constructive strategy available for resolving conflicts and disagreements.
(Michael J. Stevens, “Passive-aggression among the Latter-day Saints”, Sunstone magazine, April 12, 2013) 

Therefore, Christians that insensitively engage in overtly aggressive dogmatism on secondary or non-essential doctrines are unknowingly and needlessly “culture shocking” an immigrant who’s not equipped to emotionally process or intellectually understand the tank of “evil contention” that they’ve suddenly been dropped into. It doesn’t just make them uncomfortable, it freaks them out – we’ve seen it happen over and over and over again.

Are You Sure You’re Talking to the Right People?
Now if you’re a long term, full transitioned Ex-Mormon you may be wondering, “Why are you including us in this rant? Never Mormon Christians seems logical because they may not be able to empathize with transitioning Mormons having never been one. But I, on the other hand, was a transitioning Mormon back in the day – I get it!”

Unfortunately, our experience tells us that while long term Ex-Mormons may think that they “get it” in a lot of cases they’ve forgotten what it’s like to be tender, hurting, bleeding, broken, bitter, angry and confused after being leaving the Mormon Church. They’ve forgotten what it’s like to be an immigrant right off the boat.

In fact, we were shocked in the early days of our board to find out that some long term transitioned Ex-Mormons had the least amount of empathy for transitioning Mormons – they were our first, biggest problem group! And, nope, I’m not making this up – it’s all true folks.

So my dear Christians friends, if you really, really, really want to turn your transitioning Ex-Mormon friends into atheists, just keep it up! Fight, bicker, and spat over the smallest bits of theological and doctrinal lint you can find. Better yet, make sure you get incensed and indignant whenever an Arminian challenges your Calvinism, or an Ammillenialist questions your Rapturism. Swing those “convictions” like a sword, and never mind the collateral damage – as you watch the transitioning Mormons that you bump into while you’re tussling, fall into the nearest atheist pit.

Billy Sunday preaching 2- Internet ArchiveThe Solution
The solution is actually pretty simple:

  1. Maintain unity on the essential doctrines of the Christian faith.
  2. Extend liberty and grace on non-essential doctrines.

Or put another way:

“In essentials, unity;
In non-essentials, liberty;
In all things, charity.”
(17th century Theologian Rupertus Meldenius)

In terms of what determines what the essential doctrines of the Christian faith are, theologian Matt Slick, explains:

The Bible itself reveals those doctrines that are essential to the Christian faith. They are 1) the Deity of Christ, 2) Salvation by Grace, 3) Resurrection of Christ, 4) the gospel, and 5) monotheism. These are the doctrines the Bible says are necessary. Though there are many other important doctrines, these five are the ones that are declared by Scripture to be essential.
(Matt Slick, “Essential Doctrines of Christianity”, CARM website)

Again, the essential Doctrines of the Christian Faith are as follows:

1) The Deity of Jesus Christ.
2) Salvation by grace.
3) The resurrection of Jesus Christ.
4) The gospel of Jesus Christ, and
5) Monotheism.

A sampling of the non-essentials is as follows:

  • Eschatology (how and when the end times will unfold, the rapture, the millenium, the role of Israel today, etc.)
  • Earth Age (young v. old earth creationism, etc.)
  • Bible translation preferences (King James v. modern translations, word-for-word v. thought-for-thought, etc.)
  • Ecclesiology (church government models, the roles of clergy and laity, are Apostles and Prophets for today, etc.)
  • Soteriological Systems (Arminianism v. Calvinism, etc.)
  • Demonology (can a Christian have a demon or not, teachings on various kinds of spiritual warfare, etc.)
  • Sacrament practices (wine v. grape juice, leavened v. unleavened bread, who can administer, etc.)
  • Modes of baptism (sprinkling v. full immersion, infant baptism, etc.)
  • Worship styles (liturgical v. contemporary, hymns v. choruses, choirs, drums v. organs, etc.)
  • The gifts of the Holy Spirit (tongues v. no tongues, cessationism v. continuationism, etc.)
  • Worship observances (Sabbatarianism v. Sunday worship, observance of special holy days, tithing, etc.)
  • Food and drink (consumption of alcohol v. abstinence, kosher v. non-kosher food, etc.)
  • Various do’s and don’ts (tobacco consumption, playing cards, dancing, makeup, “acceptable” dress, movies, etc.)
  • Etc., etc., etc. This is far from an exhaustive or comprehensive list of Christian non-essentials – it seems endless at times!

Billy SundayHow You Say it Matters
So when you’re in the presence of transitioning Ex-Mormons on the non-essentials of the faith qualify your words. In other words, use terms like, “In my opinion”, “Speaking as a Presbyterian/Methodist/Episcopalian/etc. we believe”, “From my perspective”, “As I see it in the Bible”, etc.

Further, on the non-essentials of the faith do not use absolutisms such as: “The Bible says”; “The truth is”; “Reality is”; “All orthodox Christians believe”, etc. Further, responding, “that’s not Biblical”, while perfectly fine in Christianese, will usually cause a visceral reaction because in Mormonese it means, “Take that back or I’ll beat you up with scripture!”

Additionally, words such as cult, brainwashing, deception, etc. should never be used. Even though the transitioning Mormon has come out of the LdS Church and come to Christ, these are “hot button fightin’ words.” To them, “cult” really is a four letter word. You might as well have said, “Yo’ Momma!” Want to see a person transitioning out of Mormonism flee your support group at full speed and never look back? Just use the “c-word” friend.

Finally, on the essentials of the Christian faith, absolutisms are perfectly acceptable – even encouraged. For example, if a Christian couldn’t sincerely say the following, I would have serious doubts if they’re a Christian at all: “The truth, in reality is, that the Bible says – and all orthodox Christians believe – that Jesus Christ died on the cross, was buried in a rich man’s grave, and rose from the dead on the third day.”

Next, allow others to disagree with you. Extend charity to them even if, in your mind, they’re dead wrong.

And finally, if you still feel like you absolutely, positively must straighten the other person out after that you have the following options:

a) Private Message the person via email, the Facebook messaging system, etc. Or better yet, set up a telephone call or a face to face meeting. Who knows, you may end up with a friend if you do this.

b) Take the discussion to one of the many, many, many good theological discussion and debate groups on Facebook and the Internet.

Overall the biggest guideline is this:

If what you’re about to say won’t help an Ex-Mormon who’s transitioning into Biblical Christianity, then don’t say it in their presence. And, stated plainly brothers and sisters, Christian infighting never helps transitioning Ex-Mormons.

Or put another way: “Curb your dogma”

Billy Sunday preaching 3- Internet ArchiveYeah, we get it. We really, really do! 
In closing, please understand that the authors most certainly realize that just because something isn’t essential doesn’t make it unimportant. However, we have found that we Protestants are far too quick to try to turn non-essentials into essentials and then fight to the death over them. For example, is eschatology really worth dying on a hill over? After all and in the end, isn’t God going to do what God is going to do regardless of what you or I think, feel, and are convinced from scripture is going to happen? As Francis Schaeffer said so well all those many years ago:

“Among many of the youth, prophecy, rather than being a part of a larger whole of theology, has become the integration point of whatever theology they have. Eschatology has been blown out of proportion. Concentration on the second coming of Christ is falsely made an excuse for not accepting Christian responsibility for reformation in the church and in society. I hold very definite views on eschatology, but eschatology is not the integration point of my theology.”
(Francis A. Schaeffer V, “The Complete Works of Francis A. Schaeffer: A Christian view of Spirituality”, “The New Super Spirituality”, c.1972, pp.395-396)

Regardless of what non-essential doctrine that you and the authors may hold to, many Transitioning Ex-Mormons simply aren’t ready for the kind of theological nuance and rough and tumble discussions that established Christians feel so comfortable moving through and around in. So brother or sister in Christ, whatever it is, if it ain’t in the list of essential doctrines of the Christian Faith then please let it go – hold it in your hand loosely!

Again, Remember the Immigrants
Also, please remember that transitioning Ex-Mormons are like immigrants, they may not know our culture or speak our language. As a result some of their questions may come across as naive, ignorant, abrasive, even rude. And they most certainly aren’t going to speak the “Christianese” that you and I so take for granted that we don’t even realize that we speak it any more. They may also be projecting their inner pain, anger, bitterness, and frustration into the question without realizing it – we all do this from time to time, don’t we? Ex-Mormon Janis Hutchinson in her book, “Out of the Cults and Into the Church” quotes from a former cultist describing how painful this “migration” process can be:

Even now, I sometimes defend the cult! When I give our pastor and his wife a trying time, I say to myself, Myra, you’re completely hopeless. You’re not going to make it in this church! “When I become dogmatic and headstrong, I get angry with myself – especially when I know the pastor and his wife are only trying to help. Much more of this, I keep saying , and I doubt I’ll survive. But I suppose those working with me probably wonder if they’ll survive! I’m sure they must be disgusted with me. If they are, I think it’s because they just expect too much too soon.
(Janis Hutchinson, “Out of the Cults and Into the Church”, Kindle Locations 459-465)

So when you encounter such a question, comment, post, push back, or whatever from a transitioning Ex-Mormon we would ask you to take a deep breath, pray for wisdom and guidance, calm down and then respond in an even, non-threatening tone. In other words, be kind, gracious, and understanding rather than reactionary.

Finally, we know that you probably already know these Bible verses but we want to bring them to your attention again:

“Opponents must be gently instructed, in the hope that God will grant them repentance leading them to a knowledge of the truth.”
— 2 Timothy 2:25 (NIV)

“Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone.”
— Colossians 4:6 (NIV)

“But in your hearts revere Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect.”
— 1 Peter 3:15 (NIV)

And, as always, may God guide our conversation as we try with love, humility, and the fear of the Lord to aid our transitioning Ex-Mormons friends in their journey out of Mormonism and into mainstream Biblical Christianity.

Walt Kelly

Q: How did the Mormon land the Atheist pit?
A: He was bumped while two Christians were bickering over non-essentials.

RECOMMENDED RESOURCES
For further clarification on the essentials and non-essentials of the Christian faith we recommend the following resources:

Matt Slick, “Essential Doctrines of Christianity”, CARM website.

While Mr. Slick’s article is an excellent short vernacular primer, C. Michael Patton’s “Essentials and Non-Essentials in a Nutshell” article is the better resource for those seeking a fuller, more nuanced understanding of the subject.

Finally for those who find Mr. Slick’s outline format a bit too cryptic and Mr. Patton’s article too long should consider this short but insightful “What are the essentials of the Christian faith?” article on the “Got Questions?” website instead.

“A Bruised Reed” by R.C. Sproul (click link to watch streaming video)
This sermon by offers a fantastic perspective on finding that oh so elusive balance between truth, love, integrity, and tolerance. Christian brothers and sisters you I both appeal to you to and challenge you to listen to this amazing sermon. Here’s the description from the Ligonier website:

We don’t have to look beyond our own churches to see Christians fighting amongst themselves over all kinds of issues. What is the proper way to respond to Christian brothers and sisters when we are in disagreement with them? Should we treat everyone in the church the same? In this message entitled “A Bruised Reed,” Dr. Sproul teaches us about the judgement of charity as we seek to maintain peace and unity within the church.

The authors are thankful for Wikipedia Commons and Internet Archive for the images of 20th early Century evangelist Billy Sunday preaching that appear throughout the first part of this article.

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